So Damn Typical!!
OM MY GOD!!!!!
This is so hilarious! Z and I were just sitting on the sofa JUST NOW... and he was talking to his mother..the conversation lapsed into silence, and then, very quietly, very seriously, he looked at her and said:
"Cyn is going home to America. By herself." Just like that. For once I was looking straight at her face when he said it.
Lordy!!! YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE JOY SUFFUSE HER FACE!!!!!!!!! She looked so.... HAPPY!!!shocked. Like someone just said to her, "oh, and by the way, here is 10 million dollars TAX FREE". She said "REALLY????????? When?"" with a big ole ear to ear grin. She kept smiling and saying "You're going? Really? Really?" So I said simply, "Yes."
Of course my evil husband made her wait a few minutes,watching her do her little jumping in place. Quite frankly, I was surprised that he announced it. I had no warning. Then he said.. " She's only going for a visit to her parents for a few weeks."
Heh. Then I got to watch her face fall. (Psyche! I'll just take that 10 million back now!) She got all happy for nothing. YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN HER TRY TO HIDE HER disappointment..DISAPPOINTMENT THAT I WAS COMING BACK."
Then guess what doofus... I mean my darling husband said to his mama? "You wanna fly back with her?" WTF????????? (He MUST be smoking crack!)I looked at him and said "I'M FLYING TO MIAMI FIRST TO SEE MY DAD!" (ie: nowhere NEAR where she has family)
She left the room... and I was sitting there... Z looked at me, I looked at him.... and we both started cracking up. He said "DID you see her FACE???" BWAAAAAHAAAAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA I said "you got her hopes up! She looked like her dream just came true!" We both collapsed into hysterical laughter...and he looked at me and said "you are going to post this on your blog now, aren't you?"
You bet your ass I am!! *Cyn runs from the living room*
But apparently she is STILL happy she's getting rid of my butt for a while.. cause as I sit here typing... I can hear her on the phone down the hall spreading the joy to her offspring.
I'm Not Laughing Now.
Ok, NOW I'M PISSED!!!
Apparently while I was occupied writing the above post, Monster snuck back in the living room to start her usual crap. FORTUNATELY I didn't hear it myself.
It seems she slithered up to her son, my husband, and asked... "Is she REALLY going to America?" and he said "Yes." Now get THIS: Next thing past the forked tongue was: "She isn't taking Arianna with her, is she? You aren't letting her?" (WTF???? LETTING HER?) *steam starts boiling and shooting from my ears* Z said " Arianna is staying here because Cyn doesn't want her to miss so much school , plus it's the beginning of the year." Monster:" Well, you shouldn't let her take her..., you know.. she might..." He repeated the school reason again.
*Head spins with flames shooting out of my ears and nostrils* At this point, my Irish temper, which doesn't all that often really pop out... is near release.
Wisely, he recounted this to me, in the car... where I proceded to inform him that this time I'm not taking her.. but next time I AM.
Unfortunately he told me in the car. Because I would have really liked to make the following comments where she could hear them clearly.
1) If I wanted to take my daughter anywhere with me, there is NOTHING she can do to get in my way. Cumon, try me. I'd really like to see her try.
2) But the hell out, it isn't your concern.
3) What makes her insinuate that I might run off with her? Trust me, if I was leaving... I'd throw a damn farewell party, and ship ALL my belongings.. not scurry off in the middle of the night.
4) LET ME TAKE HER?? HAH! LET ME TAKE HER? If I wanted to "take off" with her, there is a lovely Blue American passport for Arianna in MY POSESSION and all I would have to do is take a nice 10 minute drive to the embassy, park my car, and walk through the gate. Any questions?
But you know what pissed me off the most? That he didn't say ANYTHING in my defense. Not one damn word.