Oprah and the Trolls
Actually, I had a hard time even typing that header for this post, if you must know. I'm sitting here laughing my lily white ass off.
Z is not a native English speaker. Even so, after 15 years with me, it is WAAAAY improved, but still, we get little glitches now and then. Tonight is a prime example of a glitch.
See, in his office, August is low season. Dead. In his office, the guys have 2, YES 2 (!) 45" Plasma Screens hanging on the wall. Attached to a satellite dish. The guys alternate between the news and various music channels throughout the day. As he works technically in Saudi, the office is ALL MALE. This is an important fact in my story.
See, apparently, everyday at 3pm, the boys watch Oprah. Yes, Oprah Winfrey. Isn't that a hoot?
Z was trying to tell me about the topic of Oprah's show today, asking if I saw it. No, I didn't. Enlighten me. So, he goes on to tell me like so.....
"Well, Oprah's subject today was people that overcame some type of problem in their life, an adversity, and she had these, um, trolls on that..." (and he makes a hand gesture to make his troll point places his had about maybe 2 foot off the ground) and that my darlings, is when it clicked in my head....as he continued saying.... "yeah the trolls, this one troll, he had a problem wi....WHAT??" I can ONLY IMAGINE what my face looked like, but I think my eyes had bugged out and my mouth was gaping open and I said:
"TROLLS???? DO YOU MEAN TO SAY DWARVES?????" and he replied, "Oh yeah, trolls, dwarves, same thing..." At which point, I went into hysterical laughter and said "no they are not the same thing!!! First, there is no such thing as TROLLS! They are some fairy creature that guard bridges and, well, are generally evil mean things. Dwarves are NOT TROLLS!" He keeps insisting there is no difference. I keep insisting there IS A BIG DIFFERENCE.
Now before I finally get some comments from people ripping me a new a-hole for laughing at dwarves, I want to tell you that, I WAS NOT LAUGHING AT THE DWARVES! I was laughing at his grammatical MURDER. GOT IT? He managed to use the word "adversity" properly, but ffed up the word dwarves? no. no. no. No hell. (another one of his beauties, instead of Hell No!) Cat, back me up on this!
Of course he went on calling the trolls to irritate me, and told me that this dwarf couple had 6 kids (of which 2 were twins!) and I said "and they were all normal size, right?" "Yeah! How did you know??" "well, cause it happens all the time!"
The dork is still calling them trolls though.