Afternoon Delight Gone Wrong
A funny thing happened today. It was another one of my “OHMYGOD I HAVE TO BLOG THIS!” moments, but with a bit of a twist, you see.
Something strange occurred today. Nooshi, our darling houseguest, went out with N (hamsters-story update later bout them) shopping and all. Arianna went out with Az and her 3 yr old to the Ritz Carlton’s beach club. Z and I were watching TV. Then, well, Monster goes out too. After a while, Z looks at me and says “Did you realize we’re home alone?”. I have to admit, it took a few seconds for me to register and remember where everyone was.
I’m sure you ALL can imagine what happened next. I mean, really! This being home alone happens, like, NEVER. You can bet your ass I wasn’t channeling Macaulay Culkin, that’s for sure.
So, ahem, after…. um, you know. I was there just kind of, well, relaxing with my eyes shut when Z attempted to make an observation-botched it- and ruined all my warm fuzzy numb feelings with one simple question.
Curious, aren’t you? Ok, I give. I’ll tell you. Ready?
………..are you sure you’re ready?……..
He said to me “What’s with the Smurf on your face?”
Me:*thinking, mind clearing rapidly: “Did he just say SMURF or am I imagining?”*
Z: “Smurf on your face. Heh.”
Me: *Eyes flying open in absolute hysterical mirth. “He DID say Smurf!!!!!!* “YOU SAID SMURFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA”----really loud, I mean SO DAMN LOUD, MY LAUGHING” HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHAHAHHA!!! Question is, what is that smurf DOING on my face???” Hahahahahaaaaa heee heeeeee heee heeeeeeee
Z: “Oh shit, I said Smurf instead of Smirk. WAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA”
Me: “Is it Papa Smurf or Brainy or Handy Smurf??” Waaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahaha—More extremely loud uncontrollable and totally hysterical laughter, except now it is BOTH OF US laughing like mental patients allowed to self-dose meds.
Z: “Waaaaaaaaaaaaa…. Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…… HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA….wheeze…. wheeze….. Haahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”
Me: “Well, at least… gasp, chortle, guffaw, shout shriek…….. ahahahahahahahha,it isn’t…….. hahahahah Gargamel….!!!!!!! Hahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa”
Continues for about 4 minutes of me and him laughing uncontrollably until I finally shout in the middle of my gut wrenching laughter…”HOW THE HELL AM I GONNA BLOG THIS????? I HAVE TO BLOG THIS!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AHHAHAHAHHA where the hell is my asthma inhaler??? Hahha “must……..*wheeze* BLOG…….*gasp* …. This!!!!!!!…… MUST…haahhhhhaaaahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa *puff, inhale* wheeze,,, laughing……. *puff, inhale* heee heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehahahahhaaaaa heeeeeeee.
Of course, he then said the most WRONG thing possible to me…….
“You’ll never blog about THIS! Never. NO WAY. Heh.” All smug and sure of himself.
I think I’ll quote Tweety Bird and Bugs Bunny on this one, shall I?
“He don’t know me very well, DO HE?”