Inquisition Confession – Week 10
I am a happy woman today, regardless of the mind blowing (literally) migrane I woke up with this morning. Honestly, I'm still waiting for my head to expl*de, but it hasn't happened yet. I figured I'd better get this confession posted before it does. So,why so happy you may ask?
Because this week I have Inquisition QUESTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wooohoooo! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!!!
Let's get right to it, shall we my darlings?
Cheryl b., whom I missed dreadfully last week, made up for lost time with her question this week, I do believe. Seriously, I love Cheryl to bits. Check out what she nailed me with this week:
So at work today there was this really hot guy, and he was really really nice (to me and his son) and I would totally have asked him out, right. He was 4 foot tall. Which makes no difference to me at all. Would it have made a difference to you? (My bet is "no") And as a side question, have you ever seen (or wanted to see) midget porn? Love ya!
Cheryl darling, I love ya babe! You win your bet, sweetcheeks! You are right, his being short, ok, DAMN SHORT wouldn't bother me at all, especially if he was such a hottie as you say. ROWRRR. For me, its really all about personality and looks don't hurt either. Like this guy Albert in my college French class. Sweet Lord was he hot. Okay, he was sexy as hell. And, well, short, but he had the most beautiful smile, turquoise eyes, and golden skin. He also happened to be all of about 5'1-maybe. But he was HOT and charming and intelligent. Did I EVER have a thing for him. We were good friends, and, well, were united in irritating the professor out of her mind, and had many secret looks between us to instigate ultimate irritation for Mme. *sigh*. Now that I think on it, and him, he had a mighty fine caboose too!
As to your side question about midget porn. Did you mean to say TROLL porn?Waahhhhhhhahahahahahahaha. Troll. Heh. Troll! Porn! Hah. Ok. Um, no, I've never seen it, and never really thought on it before. I don't think I would. Z is probably a different thing altogether, since he was all surprised about them reproducing and stuff after that damn Oprah show, bless Oprah's heart! For the record, he says it freaks him out. Me? Well, unless.. naw. Not really. Have you? (Dumb question, I know, you having worked in a s*x shop before… but I had to ask!)
That question answered, it's time to move on to my new friend Mare Imbrium, who has tapped into my fantasy and that of most of the people that showed up to my house tonight. Mare asked:
Oh, here's my question. I had a couple of good ideas but I'm going to go with this one: If there were no consequences, what kind of a trick/practical joke would you like to play on Monster? I thought that would be a fun little imagination exercise for you. :)
Well Mare, you were absolutely right. It was a fun imagination exercise. And marginally depressing also.
The general consensus for the evening by everyone who's last damn nerve she was getting on was…...... Sleeping pills, and a lot of them at once. I swear, everyone kept saying "Anyone got sleeping pills to slip her in quantity? She doesn't shut up, is nagging incessantly and making cracks and remarks about Cyn!"
If you think I haven't seriously considered keeping her medicated secretly (so much for the secret NOW, huh?) day in and day out, you are out of your head. I've thought of it, and it was suggested to me by MORE than one of my physicians. It would seem that there is a medication for psychotic individuals that makes Lithium look like M&M's I could give her that is clear and a liquid and tasteless that would keep her silent and sweet as a baby lamb. A few drops a day in her morning tea and I'd be set. Baaaaa baaaaaa. Ok. She would be stoned to the gills. The only thing stopping me is….
If anything happened to the old witch, I would get blamed and probably all sorts of scary shit done to me by the children that would suddenly decide to give a damn, hence, the daily load of crap I have to deal with which has left Nooshi, my houseguest of almost 2 months who is leaving on Friday (SOB! Waaaaaaaaaaaah) ready to attack her ass….. DAILY. So, I guess Mare, I'd medicate her with this stuff daily. I've got THREE doctors ready and willing to give it to me, all I need do is ask.
Last but not least is my darling Carrie Jo who asked me the hardest question of all:
What should I get my 13-year-old sister for Christmas? I haven't a clue...
Isn't Carrie Jo cute? Here I'm sitting wracking my own brain for a gift for my 10 year old and coming up with zilch, really.
Join the club babycakes! So far, I've gotten Arianna CD's, cassettes, and DVD's, cause, well, that's her kind of thing, ya know? My plan was for a stereo from Santa, so that ties in well. She is quite into electronics. She was hinting for PS2 games too. And for some squirrelly reason, she wants a water gun.
When I was 13, I was into electronics like cameras and such. Music, makeup and, honestly boys. And books. I was also into jewelry at a young age. Perhaps a bracelet? Nothing waaaay expensive. Just a nice bracelet? Or necklace with a pendant? She will treasure it always.
Did I wimp out on you Carrie Jo? Sorry babe. Best I can do with the exploding brain of today.
Thanks to my lovely lady friends for their questions. Until my next post, I bid you all adieu!