One Day In.....
Well, here where I live, January 1, 2005 is a memory. One day down, 364 to go. Or has that changed as a result of the earthquake last week too? What with the Earth wobbling on its axis and all that stuff, one might wonder. Yes, one might.
Oh my! It's been a while since 'we' have referred to 'ourself' in the second person. 'We' kinda like it. It's all Regal and shiiiiit. *heh, snicker, guffaw* (perhaps the snicker, guffaw wasn't so regal. Tough.)
Was thinking about making New Year's Resolutions on Dec 31st, but then decided against it. I have too much real stuff I need to concentrate on, you know?
Like finding a job, perhaps. (Ok. So, I'm dragging that one over. I'm trying!) Or, working on the whole house thing. *shudder* Then there is my other little project called having another baby. Yes, this project is getting on my last damn nerve, I tell you! Can't do diddly about it until I have a job.... and finish new slave, erm, employee probabation period of 3 mos. My bloody biological clock is ticking so loud in my ears it's almost deafening.
Perhaps that clock is ticking louder than usual because my ovarian cysts have been acting up lately. Loosly translated, that means hurting like a motherfucker. Pain so sudden and severe that you think you are going to pass out. This is exceptionally unpleasant and requires extreme amounts of self control not to drop to the floor in the grocery store you happen to be in and assume the fetal position whimpering like a kicked puppy until the pain abates.
Hell if I know why they started acting up again. That's the thing with PCOS. Sometimes, no pain at all.. others? Hellish agony. It hasn't been this bad in quite a while. I take back that "hell if I know" remark. Perhaps my ovaries and their resident 'pearl neckalce" of cysts are taking vengence on me because I have started taking my Metformin/Glucophage again. Well! It's only two tablets a day for now! Wait till I up the dose in a week! That will really piss em off I bet!
The Metformin somehow works in my case, I think, to suppress the screwy hormones said pearl necklace of painful little focking cysts produce and send to my adrenal glands that generally fock me up in a myriad of ways. Metformin/Glucophage is usually taken to control blood sugar levels, but apparently it is also good for PCOS suffers as well.
What I would LOVE to know is why in the hell after 17 years of having Grade 1 PCOS, a year ago it bumped up to a damn Grade 4, or MAX levels. In Homeland Security terms, this would be a code RED people. But of course, NO EXPLANATION or reasons why. Just scratching of Wand Monkey heads and any assistants.
I hate that.
Now then. In a way, it's a good thing I can't do another IVF baby try right now anyway. See, I found out that the embryologist (the 'baker" as I like to call him that watches over my eggs/embryos when he has them) quit. The hospital has NO EMBRYOLOGIST. That makes me sad. See. He and I were kinda friends now. He also told me often that he thinks I have lovely embryos "PERFECT!" such lovely $^*I^)($*^%(#&$(*&%$(Medical terms for embryo parts) and all. And he's gone!
Now that's a pity. No Embryologist and Wand Monkey quit and moved to another hospital without a by your leave. Well, I am keenly interested to make the acquaintence of his replacement, who, coincendentally, has the same first name, RARE first name, as the doctor that got me pregnant with Arianna.
If that isn't a sign heck if I know what is.
So, New Years Resolutions, I haven't made, technically. Its just a rollover of my prior goals from 2004. To my girlfriends ( and my dear male friend and his wife too!) who are trying and hoping to get pregnant this year, I pray we are all holding our new children by this time in 2006 or that they are at least on the way!